Crying tends to increase from around two weeks old and eases over the following months, and NHS guidance describes this pattern as usual in babies. Some crying has no cause you will ever find, and being unable to stop it is not a failure of yours. This page is health information for learning, and anything about your own baby's health belongs with a health visitor, paediatrician or emergency service. If a cry sounds different from your baby's usual cry and you cannot console them, that is a reason to seek care rather than to keep trying.

Why the early weeks are the loudest

Crying is how a newborn signals almost everything: hunger, tiredness, a dirty nappy, being too hot or cold, wanting to be held, or nothing you can name.

NHS guidance says crying tends to increase at around two weeks old and then gradually reduces from around three months. CDC describes the same pattern, with crying at its worst in the first few months and improving as a baby grows.

Evening crying is common, which is unlucky, because evening is when carers are most tired and least able to cope.

What parents are advised to try

NHS guidance lists things that help some babies and not others. Holding your baby close, skin to skin or in a sling, and moving gently while you talk or sing. Feeding, if you are breastfeeding, since suckling comforts as well as feeds.

Gentle background noise, a walk outside, rocking in a pram, or stroking your baby's back slowly. A warm bath calms some babies and makes others cry harder.

Sometimes less works better than more. NHS guidance notes that too much rocking and singing can keep a baby awake, and that lying them down after a feed can help.

Crying during feeds

Some babies cry around feeds. If you are breastfeeding, NHS guidance suggests asking for positioning and attachment to be checked, at a drop-in group or by a health visitor.

Crying during or after feeds can also be linked to reflux, where babies bring milk back up. That is a conversation with a health visitor or doctor, not something to work out alone.

Colic

Excessive crying in a baby under about five months is often called colic. NHS guidance is honest that everyone agrees colic exists and nobody knows what causes it, and that the crying sounds distressed, stops for a moment and then starts again.

There may be little to do except comfort your baby and wait it out. That is a hard sentence to read at three in the morning, and it is still the honest one.

When you have had enough

There are times when a carer is so tired and so angry that they feel they cannot take any more. NHS guidance says this happens to a lot of parents and is not a reason for shame.

If nobody can take over and the crying is overwhelming you, both NHS and CDC advice is the same: put your baby down somewhere safe, such as their cot or pram, leave the room, and let yourself calm down. Set a time limit, for example ten minutes, and check on your baby regularly.

A baby is safer alone in a cot for ten minutes than held by someone at the end of their rope. Never shake a baby. CDC describes shaking as a cause of bleeding around the brain and lasting injury, and says shaking, throwing or hitting is never a response to crying.

If you feel unable to keep your baby safe, or unable to keep yourself safe, Femio's global help page points to ways to reach support and emergency services where you are. Reaching for that is the responsible thing, not the shameful one.

Crying and your own health

Relentless crying costs sleep, and lost sleep changes how everything feels. Sleep and exhaustion after birth covers what helps when rest is not available.

Low mood, anxiety, hopelessness and frightening thoughts are common enough after birth to be worth naming out loud. Your mood after birth covers what is common in the early weeks and what needs care rather than time.

Crying that needs care

A cry that is different from usual matters. NHS guidance says a baby who cries constantly and cannot be consoled or distracted, or whose cry does not sound like their usual cry, can be unwell.

A weak, high-pitched or continuous cry is on the emergency list, especially with fever, poor feeding, changed breathing or changed colour.

When to see a doctor

Seek urgent care if crying comes with any sign in the box below, or if the cry itself has changed and your baby cannot be consoled. Seek advice the same week for crying that is wearing you down, for crying around feeds, or for crying you think is pain.

Ask for help early rather than at the end. Newborn warning signs lists what needs emergency care, and your newborn in the first two weeks sets out what is usual.

Seek care now: Contact your local emergency services or go to your nearest emergency department if a baby under three months old has a temperature of 38C or higher, is breathing fast, working hard to breathe or grunting, has blue, grey, pale or mottled skin, is floppy, is difficult to wake, is refusing feeds, has far fewer wet nappies or none in the past 12 hours, has a bulging or sunken soft spot on the head, has a rash that does not fade when you press it, has a fit, or has a weak, high-pitched or continuous cry that is not their usual cry. Femio cannot assess a baby.

Frequently asked questions

How much crying is usual for a newborn?

It varies widely between babies. The pattern described by NHS and CDC guidance is that crying rises from around two weeks and settles over the following months.

Is it wrong to put my baby down and walk away?

No. Both NHS and CDC advice is to put a baby somewhere safe, step away, calm down and come back, when the alternative is losing control.

Does holding a baby too much spoil them?

Newborns cannot be spoiled by being held. Responding to crying is what guidance describes for this age.

My baby cries whatever I do. Am I doing something wrong?

Crying that nothing fixes is common in the early months. Ask a health visitor or doctor to review your baby, and ask for support for yourself in the same conversation.